We've seen that the world population has suffered from mass-media-caused dilemma downgrading the most sacred constitution in human circle of life. Whenever a family or married couples has internal problems, it will go public as matter for discussions.
From early marriages, young-old couples, polygamist even divorces becomes hot news in that damn box and paper. I'm not referring this marriage topic in a positive point of view this time. I'm criticizing the people who made marriage straying out of its norm course causing it to be a 'good' contraceptive method.
Therefore, before I start to spewing my thoughts around, remember this, according to a research: In order for any culture to maintain itself for more than 25 years, the fertility rate should be more that 2.11 children per family. If anything less, the culture will decline. Historically no culture ever reversed at rate of 1.9, while at rate 1.3 it is impossible. As an example, if two sets of parents having a child each it is equal to half number of the first generation. The next generation in the line will only be 1:4 related to their grandparents.
1) Same-Sex Marriage
First and foremost annoying issues this century has faced is legalization of same-sex matrimony. Though only few countries has established this to its constitution and laws, but to most countries, it is disgrace to cultural & religion views. When Allah The Almighty created Adam and Eve to this world, it was never Adam and Steve nor Eve and Mary. The XX would naturally attracted to XY by emotional and hormonal effects. Nevertheless, the reproductive systems are complementary to one another. As the marriage is literally life-line of mankind.
In verse 72 of Surah An-Nahl (The Bee), Allah mentioned the creation of mankind:
As normal marriage between man and woman, both will carries responsibility as husband and wife to celebrating this holy matrimonial way of life regardless religion their belief lay upon. Then, for legalizing gay marriage is an act of out-of-bound from religious views as written in the Holy Books of the Religion itself, in this context, I shall refer to Al-Quran Al-Kareem, and from view of the Prophets Muhammad (pbuh) whom spread Islam to this whole world. In other word, who are we, the servant of Allah, to change the course of Islam, just to have fun with our own lust?
As mentioned by Allah in verse 165-166, Surah Ash-Syu'ara (The Poets):
By using our own mind, let us think, what will happen if marriage performed to both couple of the same sex? Both can't pretend to be husband and wife base on 'top-bottom' preferences nor based on 'feminine-musculine' characters. That is so condescending act to the partners because, marriage is to support one another, not to choose one of them the weaker spouse. As a women were privileged by Allah the gift of childbearing, does not stop them from work hard for the family to earn. As a men were privileged the gift of strength, still need the care of a wife whenever sick. Both are complementary to another.
At some point, any couples would want a child by relating this with my first argument, marriage is the continuity of mankind. Assume in a fertile community an average couple would have 4 children of their own. If a man-man relationship, their only option is to adopt, in which reducing the number twice as much. And to those who thinks the method of surrogates, whose sperms to chose? Still the child conceived was product with another women not in their love life, aren't that cheating? Whose family name will they choose or name the father, and what will happen to the other spouse whom could not involve?
Then comes to female-female companionship, some will say they could still bear their own child. Again, who will donates the sperm, which will come to more questions of another man in their life? Some countries using Sperm bank for donation (Islam prohibits this). What will happen to the child later on? Another questions pop-up: who is my father, don't I have my father relatives? This will comes to a incest-disaster if the child is a female for some reason later on married to the fruit of his loin, or worst, the father she never knew?
2) Culture over Religion
Any married couples has passed the standard stages in their live. It goes from marriage proposal (in some community, starts with match-making sessions), vows ceremony, wedding-receptions, goes for their honeymoon (depends) and finally living their life with one another. Although some culture may not walked through some of the first few steps, just an easy engagement followed by a humble celebration of the day of matrimony. But some really strictly follows what have invisibly written in the family traditions.
A must have engagement rings, dowry, wedding rings, photographs sessions, wedding attire, wedding cards, family receptions, wedding receptions (yes, there may be 2 of these with different set of caterings, venues and decorations). Finally if there is some money left, perhaps a planned vacation abroad for honeymoon. These cost really lot of money. Unless having a wealthy rich background, it is almost impossible to follow such tradition. In this kind of economy we are having, the middle class salary could only prepares their wedding day after stable income without need to purchase any laundering money.
In Islam, The Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) promotes marriage & prohibits the marriage process to be difficult. In Sahih Al-Bukhary, the Chapter of Marriage (كتاب النكاح ):
Married if you are able to
Mahr (dowry) for the bride
But still, that doesn't denies the justice a women standards.
Next: to be continued
From early marriages, young-old couples, polygamist even divorces becomes hot news in that damn box and paper. I'm not referring this marriage topic in a positive point of view this time. I'm criticizing the people who made marriage straying out of its norm course causing it to be a 'good' contraceptive method.Therefore, before I start to spewing my thoughts around, remember this, according to a research: In order for any culture to maintain itself for more than 25 years, the fertility rate should be more that 2.11 children per family. If anything less, the culture will decline. Historically no culture ever reversed at rate of 1.9, while at rate 1.3 it is impossible. As an example, if two sets of parents having a child each it is equal to half number of the first generation. The next generation in the line will only be 1:4 related to their grandparents.
1) Same-Sex Marriage
First and foremost annoying issues this century has faced is legalization of same-sex matrimony. Though only few countries has established this to its constitution and laws, but to most countries, it is disgrace to cultural & religion views. When Allah The Almighty created Adam and Eve to this world, it was never Adam and Steve nor Eve and Mary. The XX would naturally attracted to XY by emotional and hormonal effects. Nevertheless, the reproductive systems are complementary to one another. As the marriage is literally life-line of mankind.
In verse 72 of Surah An-Nahl (The Bee), Allah mentioned the creation of mankind:
And Allah has made for you from yourselves mates and has made for you from your mates sons and grandchildren and has provided for you from the good things. Then in falsehood do they believe and in the favor of Allah they disbelieve?
As normal marriage between man and woman, both will carries responsibility as husband and wife to celebrating this holy matrimonial way of life regardless religion their belief lay upon. Then, for legalizing gay marriage is an act of out-of-bound from religious views as written in the Holy Books of the Religion itself, in this context, I shall refer to Al-Quran Al-Kareem, and from view of the Prophets Muhammad (pbuh) whom spread Islam to this whole world. In other word, who are we, the servant of Allah, to change the course of Islam, just to have fun with our own lust?
As mentioned by Allah in verse 165-166, Surah Ash-Syu'ara (The Poets):
Do you approach males among the worlds
And leave what your Lord has created for you as mates? But you are a people transgressing."
By using our own mind, let us think, what will happen if marriage performed to both couple of the same sex? Both can't pretend to be husband and wife base on 'top-bottom' preferences nor based on 'feminine-musculine' characters. That is so condescending act to the partners because, marriage is to support one another, not to choose one of them the weaker spouse. As a women were privileged by Allah the gift of childbearing, does not stop them from work hard for the family to earn. As a men were privileged the gift of strength, still need the care of a wife whenever sick. Both are complementary to another.At some point, any couples would want a child by relating this with my first argument, marriage is the continuity of mankind. Assume in a fertile community an average couple would have 4 children of their own. If a man-man relationship, their only option is to adopt, in which reducing the number twice as much. And to those who thinks the method of surrogates, whose sperms to chose? Still the child conceived was product with another women not in their love life, aren't that cheating? Whose family name will they choose or name the father, and what will happen to the other spouse whom could not involve?
From Jami' At-Thirmizi in Chapter of What Has Been Related About The Punishment Of The Sodomite
(باب مَا جَاءَ فِي حَدِّ اللُّوطِيِّ). This is Hadith with grade Hasan:
In other Hadith grade Dhaif:حَدَّثَنَا مُحَمَّدُ بْنُ عَمْرٍو السَّوَّاقُ، حَدَّثَنَا عَبْدُ الْعَزِيزِ بْنُ مُحَمَّدٍ، عَنْ عَمْرِو بْنِ أَبِي عَمْرٍو، عَنْ عِكْرِمَةَ، عَنِ ابْنِ عَبَّاسٍ، قَالَ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم " مَنْ وَجَدْتُمُوهُ يَعْمَلُ عَمَلَ قَوْمِ لُوطٍ فَاقْتُلُوا الْفَاعِلَ وَالْمَفْعُولَ بِهِ " .That the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said: "Whomever you find doing the actions of the people of Lut then kill the one doing it (doer), and the one it is done to (receiver)."
That the Messenger of Allah (pbuh) said: "What I fear most from my Ummah is the behavior of the people of Lut."
حَدَّثَنَا أَحْمَدُ بْنُ مَنِيعٍ، حَدَّثَنَا يَزِيدُ بْنُ هَارُونَ، حَدَّثَنَا هَمَّامٌ، عَنِ الْقَاسِمِ بْنِ عَبْدِ الْوَاحِدِ الْمَكِّيِّ، عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ عَقِيلٍ، أَنَّهُ سَمِعَ جَابِرًا، يَقُولُ قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صلى الله عليه وسلم " إِنَّ أَخْوَفَ مَا أَخَافُ عَلَى أُمَّتِي عَمَلُ قَوْمِ لُوطٍ " . قَالَ أَبُو عِيسَى هَذَا حَدِيثٌ حَسَنٌ غَرِيبٌ إِنَّمَا نَعْرِفُهُ مِنْ هَذَا الْوَجْهِ عَنْ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ بْنِ مُحَمَّدِ بْنِ عَقِيلِ بْنِ أَبِي طَالِبٍ عَنْ جَابِرٍ .
A must have engagement rings, dowry, wedding rings, photographs sessions, wedding attire, wedding cards, family receptions, wedding receptions (yes, there may be 2 of these with different set of caterings, venues and decorations). Finally if there is some money left, perhaps a planned vacation abroad for honeymoon. These cost really lot of money. Unless having a wealthy rich background, it is almost impossible to follow such tradition. In this kind of economy we are having, the middle class salary could only prepares their wedding day after stable income without need to purchase any laundering money.
In Islam, The Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) promotes marriage & prohibits the marriage process to be difficult. In Sahih Al-Bukhary, the Chapter of Marriage (كتاب النكاح ):
Married if you are able to
While I was with `Abdullah, `Uthman met him at Mina and said, "O Abu `Abdur-Rahman ! I have something to say to you." So both of them went aside and `Uthman said, "O Abu `Abdur-Rah. man! Shall we marry you to a virgin who will make you remember your past days?" When `Abdullah felt that he was not in need of that, he beckoned me (to join him) saying, "O 'Alqama!" Then I heard him saying (in reply to `Uthman), "As you have said that, (I tell you that) the Prophet once said to us, 'O young people! Whoever among you is able to marry, should marry, and whoever is not able to marry, is recommended to fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual power.
حَدَّثَنَا عُمَرُ بْنُ حَفْصٍ، حَدَّثَنَا أَبِي، حَدَّثَنَا الأَعْمَشُ، قَالَ حَدَّثَنِي إِبْرَاهِيمُ، عَنْ عَلْقَمَةَ، قَالَ كُنْتُ مَعَ عَبْدِ اللَّهِ فَلَقِيَهُ عُثْمَانُ بِمِنًى فَقَالَ يَا أَبَا عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ إِنَّ لِي إِلَيْكَ حَاجَةً. فَخَلَيَا فَقَالَ عُثْمَانُ هَلْ لَكَ يَا أَبَا عَبْدِ الرَّحْمَنِ فِي أَنْ نُزَوِّجَكَ بِكْرًا، تُذَكِّرُكَ مَا كُنْتَ تَعْهَدُ، فَلَمَّا رَأَى عَبْدُ اللَّهِ أَنْ لَيْسَ لَهُ حَاجَةٌ إِلَى هَذَا أَشَارَ إِلَىَّ فَقَالَ يَا عَلْقَمَةُ، فَانْتَهَيْتُ إِلَيْهِ وَهْوَ يَقُولُ أَمَا لَئِنْ قُلْتَ ذَلِكَ لَقَدْ قَالَ لَنَا النَّبِيُّ صلى الله عليه وسلم " يَا مَعْشَرَ الشَّبَابِ مَنِ اسْتَطَاعَ مِنْكُمُ الْبَاءَةَ فَلْيَتَزَوَّجْ، وَمَنْ لَمْ يَسْتَطِعْ فَعَلَيْهِ بِالصَّوْمِ فَإِنَّهُ لَهُ وِجَاءٌ ".
Also,The Prophet said to a man, "Marry, even with (a Mahr equal to) an iron ring."حَدَّثَنَا يَحْيَى، حَدَّثَنَا وَكِيعٌ، عَنْ سُفْيَانَ، عَنْ أَبِي حَازِمٍ، عَنْ سَهْلِ بْنِ سَعْدٍ، أَنَّ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم قَالَ لِرَجُلٍ " تَزَوَّجْ وَلَوْ بِخَاتَمٍ مِنْ حَدِيدٍ ".
A woman came to the Prophet,, and presented herself to him (for marriage). He said, "I am not in need of women these days." Then a man said, "O Allah's Apostle! Marry her to me." The Prophet asked him, "What have you got?" He said, "I have got nothing." The Prophet said, "Give her something, even an iron ring." He said, "I have got nothing." The Prophet asked (him), "How much of the Qur'an do you know (by heart)?" He said, "So much and so much." The Prophet said, "I have married her to you for what you know of the Qur'an."حَدَّثَنَا أَبُو النُّعْمَانِ، حَدَّثَنَا حَمَّادُ بْنُ زَيْدٍ، عَنْ أَبِي حَازِمٍ، عَنْ سَهْلٍ، أَنَّ امْرَأَةً، أَتَتِ النَّبِيَّ صلى الله عليه وسلم فَعَرَضَتْ عَلَيْهِ نَفْسَهَا فَقَالَ " مَا لِي الْيَوْمَ فِي النِّسَاءِ مِنْ حَاجَةٍ ". فَقَالَ رَجُلٌ يَا رَسُولَ اللَّهِ زَوِّجْنِيهَا. قَالَ " مَا عِنْدَكَ ". قَالَ مَا عِنْدِي شَىْءٌ. قَالَ " أَعْطِهَا وَلَوْ خَاتَمًا مِنْ حَدِيدٍ ". قَالَ مَا عِنْدِي شَىْءٌ. قَالَ " فَمَا عِنْدَكَ مِنَ الْقُرْآنِ ". قَالَ عِنْدِي كَذَا وَكَذَا. قَالَ " فَقَدْ مَلَّكْتُكَهَا بِمَا مَعَكَ مِنَ الْقُرْآنِ ".
But still, that doesn't denies the justice a women standards.
that he asked `Aisha about the Statement of Allah: 'If you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphan girls, then marry (other) women of your choice, two or three or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one, or (the captives) that your right hands possess. That will be nearer to prevent you from doing injustice.' (Surah An-Nisa': 3) `Aisha said, "O my nephew! (This Verse has been revealed in connection with) an orphan girl under the guardianship of her guardian who is attracted by her wealth and beauty and intends to marry her with a Mahr less than what other women of her standard deserve. So they (such guardians) have been forbidden to marry them unless they do justice to them and give them their full Mahr, and they are ordered to marry other women instead of them."حَدَّثَنَا عَلِيٌّ، سَمِعَ حَسَّانَ بْنَ إِبْرَاهِيمَ، عَنْ يُونُسَ بْنِ يَزِيدَ، عَنِ الزُّهْرِيِّ، قَالَ أَخْبَرَنِي عُرْوَةُ، أَنَّهُ سَأَلَ عَائِشَةَ عَنْ قَوْلِهِ تَعَالَى {وَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَنْ لاَ تُقْسِطُوا فِي الْيَتَامَى فَانْكِحُوا مَا طَابَ لَكُمْ مِنَ النِّسَاءِ مَثْنَى وَثُلاَثَ وَرُبَاعَ فَإِنْ خِفْتُمْ أَنْ لاَ تَعْدِلُوا فَوَاحِدَةً أَوْ مَا مَلَكَتْ أَيْمَانُكُمْ ذَلِكَ أَدْنَى أَنْ لاَ تَعُولُوا}. قَالَتْ يَا ابْنَ أُخْتِي، الْيَتِيمَةُ تَكُونُ فِي حَجْرِ وَلِيِّهَا، فَيَرْغَبُ فِي مَالِهَا وَجَمَالِهَا، يُرِيدُ أَنْ يَتَزَوَّجَهَا بِأَدْنَى مِنْ سُنَّةِ صَدَاقِهَا، فَنُهُوا أَنْ يَنْكِحُوهُنَّ إِلاَّ أَنْ يُقْسِطُوا لَهُنَّ فَيُكْمِلُوا الصَّدَاقَ، وَأُمِرُوا بِنِكَاحِ مَنْ سِوَاهُنَّ مِنَ النِّسَاءِ.
Next: to be continued
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